1. Be careful not to sound “spiritually pompous” when you say things like, “Remember God will work everything out for your good.” While this is an excellent verse, it’s probably not the best one to “spout off” to an afflicted brother or sister in Christ. Tell them how much you care about them and that you are praying for them. When they are hurting the most, they simply need you to be there.

2. Give them real help—like going with them to the doctor or making a meal. Write a note saying, “I care about you and I am praying for you.” While it is okay to say, “If you ever need anything, let me know,” understand that most of the time, people aren’t going to tell you what they need unless you offer specific help.

3. Don’t tell them all the stories you’ve ever heard about others and their sufferings. Let them talk and really listen to what they say.